By Jennifer McDougall featuring Chris Prentiss
“A relationship is like a garden. To create a condition that will cause your plants to thrive and produce abundantly, you must weed, water, fertilize, and care for the plants in your garden. You must also know about the special needs of the plants you’re caring for. Some need more or less light than others, some need more or less water than others, and some need special fertilizers.”
– The Laws of Love, Chris Prentiss
Relationships are not born perfect—they are cultivated with care, patience, and understanding. After a series of failed relationships and heartbreak, I discovered The Laws of Love by Chris Prentiss, and it changed the way I approach relationships. This insightful book helped me understand the principles of creating and sustaining healthy, meaningful connections. While not every relationship was meant to last, The Laws of Love gave me the tools to heal, grow, and build better relationships moving forward.
If you’re seeking a deeper connection, this book is your roadmap to cultivating the relationship of your dreams.
Attraction Isn’t Enough
As Chris Prentiss explains, “Attraction may be what draws us to another to create a relationship, but it is not what keeps us together.” While attraction might ignite the spark, it takes much more to sustain a relationship. Without depth, shared values, and mutual respect, a relationship based solely on attraction will eventually fade.
For years, I found myself in unstable relationships because I didn’t fully understand how to create a healthy bond. I accepted love that didn’t serve me, simply because I didn’t believe I deserved better. Reading The Laws of Love helped me break this cycle by teaching me to prioritize what truly matters in a relationship: trust, communication, and shared purpose.
To Be Loved, Love Yourself First
“Love yourself first and everything else will fall into line.” – Lucille Ball
Self-love is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. As Prentiss writes, “When we practice self-love, we take better care of ourselves and make decisions based upon the high respect we have for ourselves.” People who lack self-love often make poor choices, attract negativity, and engage in self-destructive behaviors.
To cultivate self-love:
- Maintain a positive attitude throughout your day.
- Eat healthfully and stay hydrated with alkaline water.
- Avoid nicotine, drugs, and alcohol.
- Practice good hygiene and grooming.
- Surround yourself with positive, supportive people.
- Embrace change and challenges as opportunities to grow.
- Meditate daily to clear your mind and foster inner peace.
- Spend time outdoors to recharge and connect with nature.
You naturally attract healthy, positive relationships when you love and respect yourself.
Relationships Only Thrive in a Safe Space
“If the environment in which your relationship lives is harsh and unforgiving, a place where sarcasm, degradation, and anger is present…your relationship will wither and die.” – Chris Prentiss
Creating Safe Space in a relationship means fostering an environment where both partners feel secure, valued, and heard. In a Safe Space:
- Partners can express thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment or ridicule.
- Communication flows openly and without interruption.
- Both partners listen fully and respond with care.
A Safe Space eliminates fear and strengthens trust, allowing your relationship to flourish. While Safe Space encourages understanding, it’s important to remember that deal breakers—such as reckless behavior, substance abuse, or financial irresponsibility—must still be addressed firmly and without compromise.
Put Your Relationship First
“To enjoy a meaningful way of life and produce a long-lasting relationship, you must place the continuation of your relationship above everything else.” – Chris Prentiss
Successful relationships require prioritization. Every decision should consider how it affects your partner and your bond. Neglecting your relationship in favor of work, friends, or other commitments can lead to disconnection and resentment.
This doesn’t mean losing your individuality; it means recognizing that your actions now impact both of you. With this mindset, you create a partnership built on mutual respect and shared goals.
Trust: The Foundation of Every Great Relationship
“Trust is the greatest of all foundations on which to build your relationship.” – Chris Prentiss
Trust allows you and your partner to share your deepest fears and desires without fear of ridicule. It strengthens your bond and reduces jealousy or doubt. Building trust takes time and consistent actions, but it is the bedrock of a fulfilling relationship.
If trust has been broken, The Laws of Love offers strategies to rebuild it, helping you move forward with clarity and confidence.
Understanding the Light and Shadows of the Past
“Past relationships have created impressions and behavior patterns that carry over into your current relationship, affecting it in many ways.” – Chris Prentiss
Our past shapes how we approach love. By sharing your history—both good and bad—you can help your partner understand your triggers, sensitivities, and strengths. Open communication about past relationships and experiences fosters empathy and allows both partners to grow together.
Q&A With Chris Prentiss
J: Which Law of Love is most important in creating the relationship of your dreams?
C: Creating Safe Space.
J: When did you first know you were in love with your wife, Lyn?
C: After a few months of occasional meetings and emails, I began to perceive the wonderful, caring, sensitive woman Lyn is. What started as physical attraction deepened into admiration, then love blossomed. After 15 years, the love is stronger than ever.
J: What characteristics do you feel are most important when trying to find love?
C: You can’t find love. Love finds you. As Gibran wrote, “Do not think you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.”
Get Your Copy of The Laws of Love
To explore all 14 Laws of Love and discover how to create the relationship of your dreams, pick up a copy of The Laws of Love: Creating the Relationship of Your Dreams at PassagesWellnessStore.com.
For more information about Chris Prentiss, visit ChrisPrentiss.com.
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